Dear Ms. Nanci,
Our 6-year-old is starting to form her own political opinions and that's fine but with all the tension and anger surrounding politics these days how can we help her to learn to react appropriately when talking with others.
Alex
Great question, Alex, and timely too! Here are my top 3 ideas to help kids navigate the complex realm of politics and opinions.
# One
The Amelia Bedelia Effect
Sometimes we forget that young children, especially under the age of 7, tend to take things literally like the fictional character, Amelia Bedelia. If you haven't heard of Amelia that's because not only were the books written in the '60s but they were sexist. (At least the old ones were.)
In the popular children's books, Amelia took everything so literally she "beat" the eggs and "picked up" the house. The books are humorous but be careful what you say when you think your children aren't really listening. They are.
When they hear us say things like, "It'll be like living in Nazi Germany", or "The family farm will be going down the drain," They might get some awfully scary pictures in their heads and we might not even know they were listening.
Sometimes it's a good idea to find out what a child already knows before we go ahead and address their concerns. And let them know that no matter what happens politically, their daily lives will remain pretty much the same.
Teach Empathy
Sometimes, complex adult social behaviors need to be explained to kids with honesty, according to your child's developmental level. Some kids can understand a concept like "venting" when you know you're speaking with someone who agrees with you politically. They may even be able to understand the difference between debating with friends and family and knowing when to avoid a touchy subject.
One of the most important things to teach your children is the meaning of the word respect.
re·spect
1. a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements. "the director had a lot of respect for Douglas as an actor."
2. due regard for the feelings, wishes, rights, or traditions of others. "young people's lack of respect for their parents"
As long as we remember to treat others in a way that we would want to be treated ourselves, it's OK to agree to disagree.
All Feelings Are OK, All Actions And All Words Are Not
In my world view, violence is never OK except in self-defense. At the same time, I want children to feel empowered to make changes when things are unfair and not to accept injustice passively, ever. I want them to know that it's OK to be angry but not OK to blow something up, hit someone in the face with a caustic chemical, or to tell a lie that causes people to be harmed.
What it all comes down to is our own attitudes and the fact that children learn by example, We
need to be intentional about what we say and do if we expect them to do the same.
Thanks so much for reading this intentionally short article designed for busy parents with no affiliate links or annoying advertisements. If you're interested in a place for parents and providers to have some fun, visit us here!
Nanci J Bradley is an early childhood and family educator, parent, author, teacher, SELF-care facilitator, family aerobics instructor, and an all-around fun-loving person. She believes in the power of sleep, healthy eating, lifelong learning, and most of all, PLAY! She studied early childhood ed at Triton College and received her BS in education in 1986 from NIU. She received her MA in human development from Pacific Oaks College in 2011. She lives and teaches in Madison WI
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